So you probably think that since I’m a Feng Shui consultant I have the most amazing Feng Shui. Meaning everything is always in alignment, the water from my fountain is flowing in the right direction, the earth, fire and metal are all balanced in my space, my bed is in the ideal position and I live in a human comfort zone all of the time. Right?
Yes, I’m human, but I don’t always live in a comfort zone. Just ask my car and she will tell you:
The Chi Mobile: I have a bone to pick with Inessa! She likes to occasionally eat in me and sometimes she even keeps her sushi containers overnight. High Alert, high alert, spicy tuna smell lingering. Please evacuate the premise. At times, Inessa will leave her sneakers in the trunk and then she runs around her home looking for them for like an hour and ultimately she finds them where she left them and we just lost an entire hour that we could have worked out. I truly think this is her way of not having to go to the gym. Oh, and I have to tell you that it gets lonely driving only Ms. Inessa around all over town. You see she gets really embarrassed about letting other people, especially boys, ride in me because well, um…..is that Soy sauce on the passenger Seat?’
Folks as embarrassing as it is to make this admission; I highly recommend you give your vehicle a voice. Not taking care of my car was another way of not showing up for myself my life. My car is what gets me around from one place to another and when it’s not in a state of Zen-well then neither am I and am much more likely to get upset or irritable driver syndrome, AKA “Road Rage.”
After letting my car vent, I decided it was time to Feng Shui her the right way! First I took her to the car wash on Lincoln in Santa Monica, right off of the 10 freeway exit. For only $50, not only were my seats and carpets shampooed, but the exterior was washed, waxed and polished. The Chi Mobile felt like an all new and shiny hybrid!
Then, I emptied my entire trunk, including my sneakers, and the stuff that I’ve been meaning to give away or throw away for the longest time. Next, I hung a crystal from the rear view mirror to deflect road range and circulate the chi. And finally, I blessed and thanked the Chi Mobile for all her hard work in getting me around and for not polluting our environment, like some other cars on the road.
Can I just tell you that having a sweet smelling car, with clean windows so people can actually see me, paid off momentarily!
The following day on my way to see a new client, something that has never ever happened to me before took place on the 110N freeway: A young man honked at me. But that’s not all. He turned and he waved. I was flattered, so I waved back. Then he blew me a kiss, so I decided to play along and blew him one too. Then he rolled down his windows and shouted, “Those are beautiful eyes,” and so I winked like 30 winks with the only eye that knows how to wink. “Can I get your number,” he shouted. I went along with the fun and games and waved my business card in the air. Then he shouted, “Stop your car!” I laughed. He can’t be serious. “No I mean it. Stop your car!” So in the middle of rush hour traffic (thank God it was slow, and I don’t recommend this to anyone) I stopped. He then ran out of his car and literally kissed me on the cheek and ripped my card out of my hand. People were honking and it was like a scene out of a movie that has yet to be made. Wow, life is definitely stranger than art.
I’m not saying that by cleaning your car, you’re going to have a gorgeous man in his mid 20’s practically jump your breaks, but sometimes for things to get through my head, I need them LOUD and CLEAR. Now that the “Chi Mobile” was Shwayed, we were receiving feedback from the universe that when I take care of myself, it feels good and people notice. Not to mention any question about the permanence of my 30 something single status has been washed away- at least temporarily. My self-esteem has been on a high for like a week.
I’m sure you’re wondering if he has called or will I go out with him. I’ll have to leave that for “Tales of The Chi Mobile” part II.”